a rough night

Last night while friends while friends were over, starting around 9:00pm ish, I started having some trouble breathing. This happens to me sometimes and usually is relieved by my Albuterol inhaler. I tried using it and felt a bit of relief but not a lot. Before bed I could tell it was going to be a rough night. All I can describe it is as -- feels like a weigh on my lungs -- slight wheeze at times -- feels like I can't get a complete breath. If you've never had trouble breathing, its hard to describe how scary it can be and how we take it for granted, but all of a sudden you are thinking of every breath you're taking and it is so exhausting.

Anyway the night progressed like this and I kept puffing my inhaler (3x?) but felt like it wasn't giving me the medicine I needed because my symptoms were not decreasing. After a restless night I woke up around 6:30 and thought maybe a hot shower could help clear things up. They didn't and the morning was so bad, I was wheezing, hacking and my chest was under so much pressure - it hurt to take every breath. My mom brought over her inhaler and that helped me a bit more then mine was - confirming mine is out of medicine. I got a refill on mine though so hopefully I'm ok. Once the inhaler started to work I felt better when I wasn't active, but as soon as I got up and moved around, even to climb the stairs I am SO out of breath - I feel like I'm 80 years old and 700 lbs.

I called the doctor on call and she said to keep using the inhaler as I needed to to feel better, and that if the symptoms continued to call my doctor and they would probably prescribe some steroid inhalers to get things under control. I will try tomorrow but I refuse to see their nurse practitioner, because they do NOTHING for me. It is frustrating to say the least, I've already been in one time about my asthma and she just said "suck it, deal with it" basically. (the NP, not my PCP)

In other awesome news though, the baby has been ridiculously active the last few days. I have been enjoying stronger sensations and new feelings - and the baby has moved my hand on my stomach at least 3x with kicks, and Brian, my mom, my sister and my friend Christie were all able to feel her kicking yesterday. She was kicking so hard. (or punching, or flipping, not sure exactly what the movements are). It was awesome. Brian and I also bought a pre-natal listening device around 16-17 weeks and for the first time were able to pick up the baby's heartbeat last night. It was so awesome. We could hear some movement too, I think - well I was feeling at least! Then the baby must have shifted positions becuase we lost hte heartbeat but picked it up again. It was so cool! We just laid in bed listening to it (it comes with 2 headphones) haha.

I'd definitely recommend that thing for a $20 price tag. It's a bit of work to find the heartbeat and hear stuff, but it is totally worth it when you do. I'm surprised we could hear it so early.

Anyway if you wouldn't mind, say a prayer that this asthma gets under control. I'm afraid its only going to get worse as I get bigger!

22 weeks

Wow... this is really happening. It seems more real then ever now. Growing belly, little kicks and flips keeping me up in the middle of the night... baby clothes strewn all over the newly painted room, baby registries almost completed, bassinet in the room, people generously giving us so much. Aside from being so excited, I'm starting to feel my first like.... trepidations/fear about actually getting this little one out of me. I still have 4 months to think about that, but it's happening - especially when I realized my THIRD TRIMESTER will start on Dec. 8th. I almost fell over. That's only 5ish weeks away!

I have been selfish and emotional lately and for that I am sorry to anyone who has experienced any brunt of it. I'm trying to overcome it!

22 weeks development- the baby is finally almost a pound! And with that, I am gaining a lot too...

At 11 inches (the length of a spaghetti squash) and almost 1 pound, your baby is starting to look like a miniature newborn. His lips, eyelids, and eyebrows are becoming more distinct, and he's even developing tiny tooth buds beneath his gums. His eyes have formed, but his irises (the colored part of the eye) still lack pigment. If you could see inside your womb, you'd be able to spot the fine hair (lanugo) that covers his body and the deep wrinkles on his skin, which he'll sport until he adds a padding of fat to fill them in. Inside his belly, his pancreas — essential for the production of some important hormones — is developing steadily. The baby's hearing is becoming more acute and its almost constant movements may be quieted by your talking, singing, or reading to it. (no way!!??)