chloe is 5 months

It is seriously so hard for me to keep up with this blog anymore. I honestly don'tk now how regular bloggers do it. I think because I am a photographer and deal with hundreds of photos everyday, I get sooo overwhelmed by my own personal ones that I just don't have to pick the best, fix them, get them up on the blog, etc. Well... here's a shot. We'll see if this will take me like all day to get finished. Excuse that half of these photos are iphone pics, but it is my main-day-to-day-capture-the-moment camera. I love my iPhone. (despite the fact that since the OS4 update it runs like crap)

At 5 months, Chloe is:

Wearing her lightening hair in cute new ways



Trying on cute dresses that she got as gifts before she grows out of them



Riding on a boat! (just once, but it was fun!)



Rolling over all the time from back to tummy, but still can't quite get the other way (even though that was the first way she rolled over weeks ago)



She's spending lots more time outside with her friends & family






Still sleeping very well through the night, waking up sometimes... and taking pretty regular (short) naps about every 2-3 hours. Usually you are tired and cranky by 7:00pm!



Trying to sit up oh so hard! But occasionally toppling down...



Sitting on the front porch steps with mommy & daddy



Eating new foods, oatmeal, sweet potatoes, and pears
(also looking just like her daddy - what the heck)



Talking and babbling and yelling. You go to the nursery at church now because you are too loud :) But we love it at home!



Becoming friends with Tycho... :)



Laughing, smiling, and seemingly in love with everyone!



Also... TEETHING! I don't have a picture though, but your first bottom tooth is popping through ... started on your 5 month birthday!

so much interaction

Chloe is just turning into a little charmer. She smiles and laughs and interacts with us all the time. She is grabbing, playing, and trying so hard to roll over. She enjoys us lifting her up high and playing super-chloe with her! she loves when sing and talk to her. Sometimes she gets so excited she squeels, sucks in her breath and makes this hilarious noise! She has this intense pursing face she does with her lips that I adore. She is sleeping so well at night.... She is just an incredible baby. I am in love with her so much and my family & friends can't get enough of her. I'm not sure if any baby has been so loved and showered with attention. I hope it doesn't mess her up. LOL! I have so many cute videos of her but they take so long to upload, so for now I'll leave you with a beautiful picture I took of her last week. It's so amazing to watch her discovering the world!!

Life keeps chugging along

I thought life went fast before... it is nothing compared to now. I cannot believe it has been almost 3 months since Chloe was born and I was pregnant with her. It seems like just yesterday, yet also a lifetime away! Chloe is changing and growing and a lightening speed. It is all so unbelievable. I can't get over her... everyday we are just in awe of how gorgeous she is, how cute, and how special she is.... and how much we love her. The love is like deep, wide, and thick... if that makes sense. It is all encompassing.



We put her in her crib a few weeks ago and she is doing fantastic. She has started "sleeping through the night"... going from stretches of about 9pm to 5am, then growing from 8:30pm to 5:30am, and last night, 8:00pm to 7:00am - that is ELEVEN HOURS. I am in shock. I know it won't happen every night but I am soooo proud of her. And she didn't even nurse or have a bottle directly before bed last night, she actually sort of refused it, so the last time she had eaten was almost 12 hours prior around 7:00. It's insane!





Brian loves his daughter a ton. We often just look at her and marvel at how awesome, beautiful, precious she is to us. He takes a hands on role in paretning, not afraid to tell me his opinions and to tell me to back off, and let him take over. He's sometimes cleans the house while I'm gone on the few errands I run without the baby, and he is giving me countless back massages (my back is totally out of whack from lifting chloe, the baby carrier, and shooting weddings again). I love my husband so much. Our family is so incredible to me!



I've started shooting weddings/working again. It is a whole new ballgame with a child. For three main reasons - 1) I miss her so much for that 8-10 hour stretch I am gone, everytime I see a child I want to grab it. She is on my mind a lot. 2) It is very difficult to juggle it with breastfeeding and not getting a break sometimes. I am not always able to pump and this can become, shall we say, uncomfortable and can also screw with my milk supply for a day or two afterwards. But it is worth it. I've also noticed I'm taking more pictures of children at the weddings .... like my camera is drawn to them! and 3) I can hardly get any editing done during the week because she keeps me hopping. Sometimes she'll nap for an hour or two and I can get some things done, but the house needs to be kept in some semblance of order, dishes and laundry have to be attended to as well. It is tricky to balance, but I love love love Chloe's addition to our lives, it is all worth it. And I am super blessed because I have so many people who can help. My mother who is invaluable to me and loves Chloe so much, my sister and father help out, my Aunt Mary and cousin Rebekah are also helping me too. Another friend Kelly has watched Chloe (and I think really enjoyed it) twice for me without asking for any money. One of my best friends Christy made us another meal yesterday AND cooked one for us in the freezer. Even at almost 3 months, people providing us with food is HUGE. I am so grateful.







In other news our good friends Christie & Bill had their beautiful baby boy Jackson. He is a little peanut and it is so wonderful to be sharing this experience with so many good friends.



I also will have some pictures of Chloe with a few other of my friends babies that I hope to post later. Oh she's starting to pick her head up really well. She still doesn't tolerate her tummy for more then about 10 minutes at a time, but the boppy is helping her.



Also, Amy's wedding is quickly approaching and her shower is coming up. We have a few things to do to get ready but I think it will come together well. I can't believe my little sister is going to be married soon. I am so excited for her!!

And here's a video of chloe being adorable:

chloe's dedication & my first mother's day

May 9, 2010. Chloe was also officially 2 months old on this day!



The joy of my first mother's day was Chloe getting dedicated and dressing her up as my little beauty. She was so good all day and we had a wonderful lunch with both sets of grandparents and her aunty amy & future-uncle-josh. It was a great day. I love my family and my baby girl! Here are some pictures.











When we got home I set her down in this chair for a minute and she just set down with her legs crossed and had this little cute smile/expression. I ran for my camera!!!

chloe grace

Chloe Grace, Born March 9, 2010 at 11:18am, 8lbs 2.5 oz, 21 inches. She is one week old today!



Wow... You think and think about all of this for 10+ months, and then suddenly, the baby is here and you're doing it all, and its happening, and she's in your arms. I can't believe it all. I am in awe, tired, joyful, frustrated, emotional, peaceful. It's all so unbelievable.

Following is a full account of how Chloe's labor/delivery went and all our trials and joys through those few days. It was really crazy and not how I expected it at all. Nothing could have prepared me for it, and some if it feels like a dream due to the medications I was on at certain parts of my labor. I do go into detail, so if you'd rather not read it, that is totally fine - you've been warned :)

On Saturday evening, I noticed a tiny leak during the middle of the night. It's always tough at this point in a pregnancy to know exactly what you are dealing with, because well... let's be frank, you're constantly peeing and sometimes a little leaks out. But I was pretty sure this was fluid. Because it was such a tiny amount though, I wasn't too worried and figured... well if it is truly my water breaking, it will come full force today. Sunday night, I noticed it again in the middle of the night, and was sure it was fluid. So, I called my midwife and they wanted me in right away. At 1:40 pm I had an appointment and she checked me and told me I was no further dilated (only about 1 cm) but that it was definitely a high amniotic fluid leak.

peggy: "We're going to get you to the hospital to get delivered."
me: "what? really?"
peggy: "yes, there is a risk of infection to your placenta with a leak like this, and because it's been going on since Saturday, we need to get this baby out right away."
me: "cry"

So I called Brian, and we came home, got our stuff in order (it was amazing how many things we were thinking of to get done) and we went off to the hospital that night. Here is a picture of me and Brian, excited and terrified, and then me - last belly shot - almost exactly 40 weeks.



After getting to the hospital, they got us settled into the room, and it was all pretty calm and boring for a while. I was given Cytotec in the cervix around 6 or 7pm (which is a bit scary but I had to have it vs. cervadil due to my asthma), and strapped up to a bunch of monitors to keep Chloe's heart rate and my contractions monitored.



Around midnight the cytotec started to do its work and I begin intense cramping and contractions that made me absolutely nuts. I was also on Nubain and a sleeping pill, so I felt like I was trapped in a painful nightmare with no relief. Around 5:00am I finally was dilated to 3cm, so I got my epidural at 6am ..then I had the best 2-3 hours ever. I had so much peace and the pain was gone, I felt warm fuzzy and amazing. I dilated quickly in 30 minutes to 6cm due to being relaxed, then by 9am I was fully dilated and effaced and just waiting for "pushing pressure"... which admittedly was hard to feel due to the epidural. At 9:00am we started pushing, after Peggy broke my water. She immediately saw meconium and had the NICU nurses on standby. I was so scared when I heard this because I know how dangerous it can be. I knew that they were monitoring Chloe's heart rate though so I just prayed she wasn't breathing it in.

I basically pushed for an hour unsuccessfully and I was so discouraged, and already completely exhausted. My midwife had to leave for about 25 minutes to attend to another patient, and I became extremely discouraged because I knew she didn't expect anything to happen but I kept pushing and exhausting myself. Then Peggy came back and they turned my epidural down... then I could feel the urge to push (well the horrible cramping/contractions) and I became extremely motivated for it to be OVER... but also felt like I was being tortured. The baby was having a hard time coming under my pubic bone... and things were moving so slowly. I know it was all very bloody and gross and I feel horrible that Brian and my mother had to watch it all happen, I know it was excruciating for Brian to watch me in so much pain and so exhausted. My arms were killing me from holding my legs back. I wanted to give up so many times. At one point I thought I might have a C-section because Peggy said the baby's head was swelling a little bit. It turns out she was actually in a sort of posterior and had to twist a lot in the birth canal, which might have been part of the reason pushing took so long. Finally I saw them break the bed down at the end, which was a huge motivator for me because I knew that we were getting close. I had to have an episiotomy, but I honestly didn't care... I was so tired and in so much pain and so scared I wanted Chloe to be born as quickly as possible and safely.

When she came out, Peggy said, she's not going to be breathing... and she was limp and lifeless and her head was very coned...and covered in... well stuff... and they wisked her off and bagged her, trying to get the meconium out before she took her first breaths. We didn't hear her for what seemed like an eternity... brian held my hand and we just looked at each other and finally we started hearing her wimpers and little cries. The poor baby it was so traumatic for her too. It was the scariest, worst, best craziest moment of my life. I couldn't believe what we had just been through and what was happening. I had a moment with her before they took her to the nursery to get checked out:




The recovery has been painful and difficult, no question, but I'm definitely starting to improve. Our first days with Chloe are sort of a blur, yet precious and amazing too. We are barely getting into a little bit of a groove, as much as you can with a newborn who just eats, sleeps and cries and poops :) but her alert phases are so wondrous, and I just want to kiss and hold her all the time (which I don't thinks he minds since right now she is definitely preferring to be held then anything else) :) We are trying to work on getting her to sleep a little longer each night in her co-sleeper (right next to me) in bed.

Breastfeeding has been a challenge for sure, but we're getting there and improving, I think. When we get it right, it is truly beautiful and amazing. I love all the aspects of this all so much. I am in so much love with this little angel!







There are more pictures on facebook/flickr if you are interested:

Facebook

Flickr