Chloe Grace

(pics by Mindy Jobczynski :))

Well, it's pretty much out everywhere now after my baby shower this week displayed it proudly on cupcakes, embroidered on a blanket, and written in a book! We decided to name our coming-very-soon daughter Chloe Grace for 4 reasons. 1) we loved the name Chloe and liked it's meaning "Blooming," and that a Chloe who housed some disciples was mentioned in the Bible (1 Cor. 1:11) 2) It was the only one we really liked that we could totally 100% agree on, 3) Grace is after my grandmother on my father's side who passed away this year, and it is also my sister's middle name - and let's face it - always beautiful and always a quality you hope for a young girl to have! 4) I felt Chloe Grace was a name that beautiful and young for a baby, cool for a teen, yet also traditional and can grow with her well and wasn't too little-girly forever! It's certainly a popular name in the US right now, but in my circle not used very often.

So.... Chloe Grace ... blooming grace.... really liked that idea.

Hopefully our sonographer was right, and we are truly having a girl - because we are drowning in pink from our amazing shower this weekend. I hope to post more pictures soon when amazing Danielle gets a chance to get them all downloaded (she generously snapped away for me so I could enjoy the memories!) My mother, sister, aunt, friends and mother-in-law went over and above in making this shower (and the Maryland one) unbelievable and beautiful. I'll talk more about it in detail when I have photographic support :)

We were so blessed by all of the generosity - were able to purchase all of the remaining large items (playpen, breastpump, highchair) with gift cards and cash gifts we were given as well as a few returns on duplicate items ... and we received our car seat, big stroller, bouncer entertainer/exerciser, baby sensor/monitor, diaper bag, and activity mat at the shower plus tons and tons and tons of blankets, towels, washcloths, toys, etc. I also got 2 beautiful handmade gifts, a blanket and a little pillow. At my Maryland shower I also was blessed with bottles, washcloths, the toddler car seat, some stuffed animals, and tons of other goodies. I don't know what we would have done without all the help, not to mention the awesome friend who's been giving me all her baby clothes and stuff (including a co-sleeper) since I was basically 10 weeks pregnant.

It feels so selfish and so frivolous to be showered with all this love and "stuff" with the tragedies going on in Haiti and so many other mothers who need so much. I certainly have a surplus so I hope I can give what I don't need to those who do in some capacity. I want to give to my friends too but most of them are having boys and all I have is extra pink :-)

Either way, Chloe, I am just getting so desperate to meet you - I can't wait.

emotional breaks & maybe a name?

I had an emotional/hormonal breakdown of some sort today for no reason at all except the stress of playing a board game. I have no idea what came over me, I could feel it building and I just LOST it. Anyway once I got away from everyone and cried for a bit I felt better but I still feel like I'm teetering on the edge of something. Maybe stressful board games with too much competition aren't in my near future for a little while. lol.

Course that wasn't the first one... on our drive to Maryland, I was checking in on people's facebooks, as I do, and I saw that I had been "un-friended" by someone. I was so upset and confused I cried. OVER FACEBOOK. It turns out it was a total fluke and the person did not un-friend me on purpose, but you can see where I am at emotionally/relationally. Oh Lord, dear Lord... please give Brian strength to deal with me. He has 14.5 more weeks of me like this. Ok, you know I'm going to be a mess after the baby is born too (hopefully a joyful mess)...so maybe longer ;)

For the last 5 days I've been dealing with some very very weird, slightly burning, slightly feeling like muscle strain and odd pains near my rib cage, under my bra line and stretching down an inch or two. They are mainly concentrated on the left hand side. I can't figure them out and they are irritated when 1) i sit too long in certain positions, or 2) I walk around too much, holding any weight at all (like my purse, etc). I'm not sure what is going on. I thought it could be related to dehydration, so I'm trying to drink fluids as much as I can, but I'm sure I could up that a bit. It sounds silly, but pray for me because it is really painful and getting in the way of a lot... I feel very weak and ridiculous cuz I can't do as much and have to stop doing things due to the exhaustion and discomfort of the pain.

We have been going back and forth on some names for a while. I am someone who has no problem getting these things picked out ahead of time, and I always envisioned we would know the babys name the second I found out the sex, but it has been so much harder then I imagined. Yesterday I ran across one I've seen a hundred times, but it hit me anew, and it is one I think Brian and I both like equally. The meaning is beautiful too. We'll see. It's simple and sweet. But, maybe I'll just keep them all bouncing in my head until I see that little face... it could go either way at this point!

Have a few pics from Thanksgiving to post - hopefully I can in a few days when I get home. I thought December was going to slow down big time with work, but the first week is still looking INTENSE. I'm dreading/grateful for the work.

heartbeat

Had my first physical exam today - relatively uneventful although rather uncomfortable (didn't think I'd have to get a PAP while pregnant). But I did get to hear the baby's tiny heartbeat faintly behind mine. I was so excited because the midwife said she can't always detect it this early, but she likes to try, and she was very persistent until she found it, and seemed as excited as me! :-) Even though I'd already seen it on the ultrasound last week, it was still fantastic and made me smile. Another appt at 13 weeks (a month from now) and Brian will get to hear it too.

Other than that, things have been good. I feel a bit of my energy coming back. I am still queasy in the mornings, but days like today are good, I feel like I can go out and do things and even do dishes and vacuum. I'm glad and hopeful that I'm coming out of the worst of the nausea and symptoms.

Brian and I looked at baby names - top 200 from 2005 yesterday in a book I had. It was interesting how many we DIDN'T like or couldn't even consider, some that we loved but close friends had already taken (like Eli, Mason, Caleb, etc. ;-) Girlwise I think we are less picky and have more choices. Who knows though!

Anyway - that's it for today. Leave me a comment if you even read this!